I want to live forever inside that moment and never have to say goodbye.
Living life inside a raindrop of a self-contained moment, sliding down a glass window past countless other raindrops — all these other moments being had by so many others. I never want any of it to end. Instead, I want to progress slowly, gently, because that is the only way I can reach the endless places I want to be. Journeys change the destination, I believe. Running and taking a stroll to someplace make for an entirely different experience. How much of what is around us do we miss when we run, how many times is the preamble lost on us, fast-paced and erratic as we are.
The places lacking Time, devoid of it — that is where I’ve always yearned to go. These places where it feels like the world is suspended inside another dimension, like a raindrop that is just about to fall but never does, frozen in mid-air.
That is how these moments feel. Even as they last mere seconds, barely even minutes. It feels like Life has stretched the rules of Time to accommodate this one moment, to give me this one lingering thing : a taste of eternity in a life so ephemeral.
But all raindrops fall, all moments end in puddles on the floor.
It is a long time though before we reach the end of all things.
That is what I thought as I sat in an ever-transiting bus, head laid to rest against the glass pane, night-sky hair fluttering out of the window between two glinting metal bars.
In all sweet irony, this could look like a prison. As though I were trapped in movement, in transit, in travel and liberation would be to return home, to fall into the arms of the routine waiting for me at the bus station.
I would find myself trapped in routine and travel both if I was not careful. If I did not try to find the beauty in them, to not see them as prisons. Outside of my head though, there are forces greater than my will, my perception. Forces that reroute my trains of thoughts in one single movement.
For instance, the setting sun is pouring in my eyes, as though the sky had tipped and was emptying our universe’s largest star in my irises. Bit by bit, my dark-set eyes are absorbing the light from the sun, drinking it one ray at a time until ultimately, there is nothing left to take and the sky is left in darkness.
But we are not there yet, not yet home, not yet in darkness.
Light is flowing where Time is not, and I am floating a little ways above Earth, one or two parallel worlds away from real life. And ah, what a wonderful place to be : living inside a stretch of Eternity, like a raindrop perpetually about to fall. Falling, falling, falling gently; falling like night on the city.